The Goat’s Voice

COMING SEPTEMBER 14, 2018

“For fifty years I have been planning the moment of my escape, and the wind has brought me to your door.”

The wizard Deifilia arrives unannounced with bad news: Pernilla has been chosen to start the revolution.

Pernilla agrees that slavery is wrong, but she believes revolution is best left to the professionals. She is a simple farmer who is content living a simple life with her goat. This “Chosen One” business is utter nonsense.

But when her goat starts talking, her destiny is hard to ignore.

Can a woman and her goat truly change the course of history?

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Now Available – IN POOR TASTE

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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Coming Soon – New Anthology, “In Poor Taste”

In Poor Taste
A Collection of Short Fiction Which Can Only Be Described as “The Opposite of a Masterpiece”

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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Now Available – The Dragon’s Attempt at Revenge

“When the dragon flies again, The Three shall unite and conquer all!”

Both the chimera and Alesstros have quoted the so-called prophecy. The battle with Alesstros is over (again) and The Three were defeated (right?). The prophecy was garbage. The purple dragon doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Does he?

Meanwhile, Collin wants Neal to meet his parents. Neal has faced trials, but nothing as painful as in-laws. Brogan the Knight Wanderer never passes on a journey, and before anyone can argue, the gang is back together and on the road to Tournefortii.

Between wedding plans and revenge plots, the Finnalys and their adopted family are bound to land neck-deep in a steaming pile of trouble – which is where Teagan spends most of his time anyway.

The dramatic conclusion to the Finnaly Trio Trilogy will answer the most important question:

Why is it always poop?

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The Little Book of Inappropriate Morals

Stories That Aren’t Helpful At All

AVAILABLE APRIL 4!

We talked for a while, until he stumbled off to parts unknown. I was filled with a new sense of purpose that would not manifest itself until I was older (and stronger).

I never saw the old man again, but I never forgot him. I meant it when I said he was my hero. He still is. Meeting him inspired me to become who I am today.

I made my vow there on the park bench while the old man sobbed into his paper bag.

The short stories in this collection will not teach you anything. They will not assist with moral dilemmas. They will not tuck you in at night. They will not do your laundry or take you to the movies.

Within you will find – among other things – examples of poor role models, romances gone wrong, and fables with morals you almost recognize. Mysteries will be solved (at what cost?) and prisoners will be…well, imprisoned. Obviously.

These stories will not help you – unless what you’re really looking for is a good laugh.

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The Latest from Holly Geely

Two things: a new short story available for purchase (murder mystery genre parody) and Which Way is Left? is now available as an eBook.

NEW SHORT STORY!!! SILLINESS, MURDER, AN OLD LADY!!!

Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston

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When Opal Gemima Marigold hears that her old friend Winston was murdered, nothing can keep her from the case. There is no danger too great nor any detective too stubborn to stop this retired ballon-stretcher/ex-mercenary/part-time janitor/doily-maker.

Time is of the essence as a string of murders follows (naturally the killer didn’t stop at one) and Opal must determine the most important thing:

Who would want to kill poor Winston?

And the eBook:

Which Way is Left

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Olive has nine tickets to the sold out Cylindrical Sludge concert in Nightmare City.  A road trip with friends seems like the perfect way to spend the summer before college, even if she does have to bring her brother along.

What Olive doesn’t realize is that old rivalries, new enmity, and the occasional bout of motion sickness may just ruin the trip for everyone.

Which Way is Left? has a glorious cast of diverse teenagers who poke fun at teenage tropes while also including a spectrum of gender identities.

With extra delightful colour illustrations by Ethaniel Ritchot.

 

Rafaello’s Eternal Design Inc.

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Rafaello’s office is a collection of the most creative, most talented creatures, alive or undead. His designers can do anything, from revamping your tomb to updating your out-of-date curse website.

Living and working forever isn’t easy. Pegasus in Monster Resources knows the truth of that. Sam Devile, Rafaello’s latest addition, struggles with unwanted emotions. Ketos fears his past will come back to haunt him. Even Rafaello himself, vampire extraordinaire, deals with the occasional hardship.

In this collection of shorts, some of his best (and worst) employees come together to make trouble. And sometimes they even do their jobs.

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