Now Available – IN POOR TASTE

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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Coming Soon – New Anthology, “In Poor Taste”

In Poor Taste
A Collection of Short Fiction Which Can Only Be Described as “The Opposite of a Masterpiece”

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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The Little Book of Inappropriate Morals

Stories That Aren’t Helpful At All

AVAILABLE APRIL 4!

We talked for a while, until he stumbled off to parts unknown. I was filled with a new sense of purpose that would not manifest itself until I was older (and stronger).

I never saw the old man again, but I never forgot him. I meant it when I said he was my hero. He still is. Meeting him inspired me to become who I am today.

I made my vow there on the park bench while the old man sobbed into his paper bag.

The short stories in this collection will not teach you anything. They will not assist with moral dilemmas. They will not tuck you in at night. They will not do your laundry or take you to the movies.

Within you will find – among other things – examples of poor role models, romances gone wrong, and fables with morals you almost recognize. Mysteries will be solved (at what cost?) and prisoners will be…well, imprisoned. Obviously.

These stories will not help you – unless what you’re really looking for is a good laugh.

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Once Upun a Time – Now Available!

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Once Upun a Time
A Book of Puns and Other Nonsense

Do you like gripping tales of action and adventure? Are you fond of spooky science fiction? Does high fantasy float your boat, while low fantasy tickles your yacht? Well, good news – none of that is what you’ll find here!

This book includes:
An exclusive story set in The Dragon’s Toenail universe!
Zeus’ birthday party!
Appliances doing their duties!
The 1980s of the future!
Exclamation points!!!
And more!

Sit back, relax, and ready your eyes for rolling; this book has a little pun for everyone.

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Amazon.ca
Amazon.co.uk
CreateSpace store
Kobo

Once Upun a Time: The Cover!

Once Upun a Time will be available on December 1, 2015. (This holiday season, give the gift of laughter!!)

Once Upun a Time
Puns and Other Nonsense

Do you like gripping tales of action and adventure? Are you fond of spooky science fiction? Does high fantasy float your boat, while low fantasy tickles your yacht? Well, good news – none of that is what you’ll find here!

This book includes:
An exclusive story set in The Dragon’s Toenail universe!
Zeus’ birthday party!
Appliances doing their duties!
The 1980s of the future!
Exclamation points!!!
And more!

Sit back, relax, and ready your eyes for rolling; this book has a little pun for everyone.

And now, the cover…

onceupunatime-front-small

The cover was created by the supremely talented Ethaniel Ritchot. Why is it a fish, you ask? Why not read it and find out?

Fly On The Wall

From Flash!Friday.

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Fly On The Wall

At one time I didn’t care about the affairs of humans. I was content with my limited existence; eat, sleep, fly. Like other flies I was unaware of my mortality, aside from a survival instinct.

Life was simple and I had no master.

Now I must do the Wizard’s bidding. I am his eyes and ears on the walls of his choosing.

The Wizard extracts the conversations from the memory I should not have. I recognize that I don’t have a large enough brain for memory. How do I know that? The Wizard has made me so much more than what I should be.

He pats the top of my head as I crawl across his fingers. No one looks twice at the homeless man talking to himself. He, too, is next to invisible in his disguise, but I can go where he cannot.

“Good boy,” he says, as though I am a loyal dog.

Loyalty. A concept I should not understand, and do not feel. If I could break away from him I would. If I could go back to the not-knowing, I would.

I am the fly on the wall. The world does not know enough to fear me.