Summary of C4 2018

THE GOOD

This year they added a DJ and karaoke, which are both big pluses for me.  I had to quit voice lessons a few years back due to financial reasons (that, and the lessons were honestly useless, given that I only performed once a year at their recital and didn’t use the training for anything else) and I miss singing! There’s talk of a karaoke night, I’m hoping early in the new year, but people are hard to manage…

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Fitness Update 2+ Years On

In reviewing my sad, neglected blog, I realized that I made an initial fitness post, an update a month later, and then completely forgot I was blogging about it. Now it’s been over two years.

I am happy to report that I still lift three times a week. I have embraced weights with an enthusiasm I did not know I possessed. Here are some of the fitnessy things I’ve done in the past two years.

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The Goat’s Voice

COMING SEPTEMBER 14, 2018

“For fifty years I have been planning the moment of my escape, and the wind has brought me to your door.”

The wizard Deifilia arrives unannounced with bad news: Pernilla has been chosen to start the revolution.

Pernilla agrees that slavery is wrong, but she believes revolution is best left to the professionals. She is a simple farmer who is content living a simple life with her goat. This “Chosen One” business is utter nonsense.

But when her goat starts talking, her destiny is hard to ignore.

Can a woman and her goat truly change the course of history?

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Now Available – IN POOR TASTE

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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Coming Soon – New Anthology, “In Poor Taste”

In Poor Taste
A Collection of Short Fiction Which Can Only Be Described as “The Opposite of a Masterpiece”

Revenge. Murder. Betrayal. Practical jokes.
Toilet humour.
Hideous punchlines.

Welcome to a collection of Holly Geely’s groan-inducing short fiction.

Ogres become chefs. Minor gods fall to Earth for bathroom infractions. Santa Claus gets what’s coming to him.

Flower puns.

The best (worst?) part is that it’s all In Poor Taste.

This anthology includes Opal Gemima Marigold and the Death of Poor Winston, a formerly ebook-only adventure.

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Summary of Keycon 2018

I spent this past weekend at Keycon. My main goal was to sell books, which I’m happy to report actually happened! Sales at cons are generally mediocre for me at best, but I did well, and I’m happy.

It was also the most fun I’ve had at a con in a long while. The sense of community and the welcome we received at every event made it feel like home.

I convinced my boyfriend to come to the Eye of Argon reading – he had a blast. He agreed that this was one of the best con experiences he’s had. He was most impressed by the hospitality suites, and I agree. Whenever we walked into a new room we were made to feel welcome.

There was never a moment of boredom.

I took part in thought-provoking discussions:
I particularly enjoyed the discussion about where to draw the line between personality and writing, as well as the discussion on representation.

I played fandom games:
At one point there was talk of a poke ball up someone’s butt. Does it get any better than that?

I talked with other authors:
We discussed technique (both writing and selling) and we discussed matters completely unrelated. I think, and hope, that I made some new friends.

I took in the hospitality suites:
The Tomodachi Anime Club suite was by far my favourite place of the weekend. (The other hospitality suites were also excellent.) Whenever we walked in we were greeted with a smile. They also introduced us to a Japanese game show which I know is going to become a staple at home.

Our Sunday dinner from the Medieval folks, which we were recommended to purchase, lived up to its stellar reputation. They had some technical difficulties, but they kept us informed and everything was calm and polite. And the food was friggin’ delicious.

Unfortunately, the hotel’s restaurant also lived up to its own reputation which is far from stellar. It had by far the worst service I’ve experienced at a restaurant. It was half an hour before anyone took our order, another twenty minutes before any food came, and my brother’s food came even later and it was cold.

Overall, Keycon was a blast! I’ve already purchased my table for next year.

It’s my birthday, and here’s where I’m at

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything, so I’ll be uncharacteristically serious for this update.

At the beginning of this year, I optimistically promised fiction for this blog on special occasions. That didn’t last long; in April, I made some major real-life changes. The changes were good, but hard.

The husband became the ex-husband. The transition was tough, but it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. In part of an ongoing process to love myself more, I finally realized how miserable I was. I should have left a long time ago, but I know regret is useless. I did learn a lot, about who I am and who I don’t want to be.

Leaving made me free. Free to stop hating myself.

I moved in with my brother, who is a terrifically fun roommate. We spent weeks playing The Old Republic. At bedtime we listen to cassettes. (Yes, casssettes.) Currently we’re marathoning Supernatural. There’s a Hanson poster from the 90s on my living room wall. Our bedrooms are Slytherin (him) and Ravenclaw (me). It’s amazing.

In July, something wonderful happened. I started dating the man who’s been my best friend for the past ten years. The one who’s always been there for me when I need him. The man who liked me secretly and silently for so long; the man I’ve been in love with for ages, but couldn’t admit to it, even to myself. Some might argue that it’s too soon after my failed marriage, but those people don’t know us or our situations. We are happy, really happy, in a way I thought I could never be. I don’t have enough words to describe how much he means to me.

I’ve done a lot of reading. I’ve been through a lot of therapy (physical and emotional). I’ve kept up with my exercising. I’m stronger than I’ve ever been (again, physically and emotionally). I know who I am and I no longer feel ashamed of it.

And now that the real life stuff is out of the way:

I’ve done a couple of short stories for anthologies, and one (or two?) more to come. I’ve also signed up for NaNoWriMo this year so I can hopefully get a start on an idea that’s been rattling around in my head. I’ll be attending a couple of conventions in the coming year to hopefully shift some merchandise, so if you’re in the area, come and see me!

 

Now Available – The Dragon’s Attempt at Revenge

“When the dragon flies again, The Three shall unite and conquer all!”

Both the chimera and Alesstros have quoted the so-called prophecy. The battle with Alesstros is over (again) and The Three were defeated (right?). The prophecy was garbage. The purple dragon doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

Does he?

Meanwhile, Collin wants Neal to meet his parents. Neal has faced trials, but nothing as painful as in-laws. Brogan the Knight Wanderer never passes on a journey, and before anyone can argue, the gang is back together and on the road to Tournefortii.

Between wedding plans and revenge plots, the Finnalys and their adopted family are bound to land neck-deep in a steaming pile of trouble – which is where Teagan spends most of his time anyway.

The dramatic conclusion to the Finnaly Trio Trilogy will answer the most important question:

Why is it always poop?

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An Update from Holly Geely

At the beginning of the year I optimistically promised holiday fiction for this blog at least twice a month. Unfortunately, due to multiple events, that won’t be as consistent as I’d hoped. Here it is close to the end of May and life still feels like a whirlwind.

I will spare you the personal details, but these past weeks have been filled with regret and self-doubt. Most of it was unrelated to blogging or writing or even being online, but all of that has taken a hit.

I’m still writing. Whenever I think about giving it up, I remember the young person who approached me in the store one day and said they were a fan of my work. It was random and amazing and I will never forget it. Even if that young person remains my one and only fan (or has indeed taken a disliking to me in the interim) I am going to write when the writing mood takes me, whether I can sell it or not.

Finnaly #3 will be out in the next couple of months, once editing/cover are done. (#1 here, #2 here…books about dragons, adventure, romance, and potty humour!) Another book in the same universe struck me one day and is now in the preliminary stages. I’ve volunteered for a Christmas anthology (yay!) and I have another silly project on the go that may or may not see the light of day.

In the meantime, I will attempt to post here more frequently so the poor blog doesn’t feel such neglect. I’ve had a heck of a time coming up with interesting topics, but I’ll do my best.

 

Want to read something I’ve written?
All published works

No Entry

This story will appear in Holly’s anthology In Poor Taste, due out in 2018!

“This ticket is valid. I bought it weeks ago. Let me in,” said Flip.

The troll on guard shook his head. “You’re on the list.”

“What list?”

“The list. You’re not allowed inside.”

It was the worst thing a trickster could hear; it was more painful than the terrible “I know your real name!“, and even more painful than “I’m sorry, she didn’t make it.” Being barred from the Convention was worse than having a piece of his soul chewed off by a demon.

“But why?” Flip demanded. He paid his dues to the fairy society every month. He met his yearly magic quota. His wings were regulation glittered and he had brought a bottle of baby tears for the Ghoul. What could possibly have landed him on the list?

“Says here you’re not funny,” said the guard.

What?!”

“Says you cost the Convention too much money on cleanup last year. There’s a note here. Tell Flip that blowing up a line of port-a-potties does not count as a prank.

“Who said that?” Flip demanded. “Of course it’s a prank. It was a commentary on the state of the Trickster economy. There was crap everywhere. It was hilarious!”

“No entry,” said the guard.

“I want to talk to your superior! I’m the funniest Trickster in the community. You can’t do this to me!”

“Get over yourself, Flip,” said the next in line. Flip whirled to face the leprechaun and shoved a finger in his face.

“Say that again, I dare you!” Flip said.

Get over yourself. You’re not funny and everyone knows it. You’ve never once tricked a human into anything useful. How many babies have you stolen?” The leprechaun smirked at Flip’s silence. “There, you see? Useless.”

“Shut your stupid face, O’Kenny!”

“Or what, you’ll make me?”

“Yeah!”

“Let’s go!”

“That’s enough,” said the guard. “No entry, fairy. Turn around and go home.”

Flip couldn’t miss the Convention. On the eve of March 31 all the Tricksters got ridiculously drunk together and spent April Fool’s wreaking havoc on humanity. It was the best day of the year. What would he do tomorrow without the company of his people?

Flip shed a single sparkling tear.

“Hah! Got you,” said the guard.

“What?”

“April Fool’s, fairy. Tricksters aren’t the only ones with a sense of humour.” The guard stepped back to let Flip pass.

On that day, Flip learned a new respect for troll kind.

He also tripped O’Kenny right into a port-a-potty for revenge, so his self-growth was offset and he learned nothing.