It’s my birthday, and here’s where I’m at

It’s been a long time since I’ve posted anything, so I’ll be uncharacteristically serious for this update.

At the beginning of this year, I optimistically promised fiction for this blog on special occasions. That didn’t last long; in April, I made some major real-life changes. The changes were good, but hard.

The husband became the ex-husband. The transition was tough, but it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. In part of an ongoing process to love myself more, I finally realized how miserable I was. I should have left a long time ago, but I know regret is useless. I did learn a lot, about who I am and who I don’t want to be.

Leaving made me free. Free to stop hating myself.

I moved in with my brother, who is a terrifically fun roommate. We spent weeks playing The Old Republic. At bedtime we listen to cassettes. (Yes, casssettes.) Currently we’re marathoning Supernatural. There’s a Hanson poster from the 90s on my living room wall. Our bedrooms are Slytherin (him) and Ravenclaw (me). It’s amazing.

In July, something wonderful happened. I started dating the man who’s been my best friend for the past ten years. The one who’s always been there for me when I need him. The man who liked me secretly and silently for so long; the man I’ve been in love with for ages, but couldn’t admit to it, even to myself. Some might argue that it’s too soon after my failed marriage, but those people don’t know us or our situations. We are happy, really happy, in a way I thought I could never be. I don’t have enough words to describe how much he means to me.

I’ve done a lot of reading. I’ve been through a lot of therapy (physical and emotional). I’ve kept up with my exercising. I’m stronger than I’ve ever been (again, physically and emotionally). I know who I am and I no longer feel ashamed of it.

And now that the real life stuff is out of the way:

I’ve done a couple of short stories for anthologies, and one (or two?) more to come. I’ve also signed up for NaNoWriMo this year so I can hopefully get a start on an idea that’s been rattling around in my head. I’ll be attending a couple of conventions in the coming year to hopefully shift some merchandise, so if you’re in the area, come and see me!

 

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